the world is our classroom...a lifelong love of learning......capture the teachable moments......learning through living......discovery is a lifestyle...when you rise up...when you lie down...when you are walking along the way...






Philosophy



There are many reasons that  significantly influenced our decision to embark upon the homeschool journey. And we've chosen a particular style of educating our children for several reasons as well. In this section, I'll begin to pull together the information and inspiration that has led us in this general direction.

The 'whys' are just as important as the 'hows'...and perhaps even more so. The reasons why we choose a particular path helps us better determine the wisest choices for our children...and for our family needs as a whole. 

Each family is different, naturally, and there is no one perfect or exclusive path to follow. The beauty of the homeschool life, and one of many reasons I refer to this as the 'beautiful' homeschool, is that it can be so incredibly and beautifully tailored to any and all of life situations. The adaptability and flexibility of the homeschool is boundless...hindered only by lack of imagination or creative solutions.

In the section below I've attempted to help guide you in forming the Philosophy aspect in directing your family's homeschool endeavor. Not that this offers any specific path that should or should not be taken. It's an example of several over-arching ideas or areas to investigate in starting your adventure into a homeschooling lifestyle that works. Start small...take baby steps. Don't panic or feel that you must commit yourself to expensive or extensive curricula or materials.

And just because I've excerpted these particular articles, please know that we haven't done all that has been suggested here. We haven't learned Greek or Latin...and may never do so. I'm not into dissecting things, so we may not do that either. We go more in the homestead direction so we incorporate what we're doing with animals and farm life where some families move more toward the traditional academic models. Even with that don't feel as though you must move the public classroom into your living room.

There absolutely is no one right or wrong way. The important thing is that you and your children are relaxed, unhurried, and enthusiastic about enjoying the journey.


Toward an Educational Philosophy


Most people can agree that the Classical standards of the educational precepts of the past...from ancient Greece up through the Renaissance...and into the Colonial settling of America was of a superior caliber setting the basis for the forward progress in culture and the more civil elements of civilization. If nothing else, the classics are an historical foundation in which to at least begin the quest in answering the above questions.

The following article by the Bluedorns of The Trivium website offer a general starting point for children under 10. Their focus is more on the Classics from a Christian perspective although this article gives some very general parameters to help get you thinking. Most importantly, I want to convey the notion...really, the fact...that this isn't as difficult and overwhelming as some might initially suppose.


Building a Firm Foundation for Classical Education

By Harvey and Laurie Bluedorn
Printed in PHS #29, 1999.

Find this article

I've put my notations in [ ].


Some Classical Educators focus on the Classical method and others focus on the Classical subjects. Those who focus on the subjects (Latin, Logic, etc.) tend to want to get to the academics as early as possible. Those who focus on the method (the Trivium) tend to slow down and pay more attention to developmental principles. Classical Education is not just Latin and Logic. It is a way of life.

In this article we discuss what to do with a child before age ten. Around age ten, the brain becomes physically able to make more complex connections, which, among other things, makes the child more able to handle abstract concepts and helps the child with self-management and self-control. At age ten, the child is fully entering the grammar stage. Before this time, the child is mostly dependent upon his concrete sensory experiences for learning. He is really in a pre-grammar stage. He is still "booting up," to put it in computer lingo.
Hence, we suggest that academics are not necessarily the focus before age ten. Rather, this is the time to sow the seeds of honoring God and parents, developing the capacity for language and the appetite for learning, enriching the memory, and instilling a work and service ethic. This is the time to lay the foundation for the academics which will follow.
The following is a list of ten things we believe are important to teach your children before age ten.


1. Reading and Handwriting
Sometime before your child is ten, you should teach him to read using a good intensive phonics method. The age a child learns to read is no indicator of how smart he is or how well he will do in academics later on. Our children learned to read anywhere from age five to age nine. At the same time he learns to read he should learn to write his letters. Copywork is a good way to practice handwriting skills and to prepare him for creative writing when he is older. Cindy Rushton's book Language Arts . . . The Easy Way (1225 Christy Lane, Tuscumbia, AL 35674) outlines how to incorporate copywork into your curriculum.


2. Narration
Charlotte Mason developed the concept of narration in Britain at the close of the nineteenth century. The concept has been reintroduced to homeschooling families by Susan Schaeffer Macaulay in her book For the Children's Sake and by Karen Andreola through her articles in Practical Homeschooling.
Narration is very difficult to do. Narrate the sermon you heard last Sunday, without notes. Could you do it? Most of us would have trouble even remembering the text of the sermon. That's because our minds, as adults, have not been trained in the art of narration.
Narration is best started when the child is young (4 or 5), practiced on a daily basis, and continued on through high school.
If narration is a new concept to you, then it is best to start out small. Read to the child just one short paragraph from a simple story, then ask him to retell, in his own words, what you just read to him. In the beginning you may need to prompt the child with questions about the passage. As the child becomes more practiced in the art of narration, he will be able to narrate longer and longer passages.
Narration is an exercise which builds mental stamina. According to Karen Andreola, "Because narration takes the place of questionnaires and multiple choice tests, it enables the child to bring all the faculties of mind into play. The child learns to call on the vocabulary and descriptive power of good writers as he tells his own version of the story."


3. Memorization
Encourage the child to memorize things: the Greek and Hebrew alphabets, passages from the Bible, poetry, catechisms, excerpts from literature. Perhaps the child can then recite his memory work in front of the family or a larger group. This is an excellent way to prepare the child for competitions in oral interpretation and speech and debate when he is older. Memorization, along with narration, trains, sharpens, and strengthens the mind and prepares the child for more rigorous studies later on. And that's precisely what we want to do in the early years of a child's life. By contrast, television, videos, and even much of the so-called educational computer software works in the opposite direction.


4. Hearing and Listening
By reading aloud to your child, you teach him the sound of words and develop his vocabulary while enlarging his understanding of the world and developing his imagination. We suggest you read to each child at least two hours a day. Read from a wide variety of good literature: biographies and historical fiction. Include books on science, geography, art, music, and history.
Three "don'ts":

  • Don't be afraid to read long chapter books to young children. A five-year-old is capable of attending and understanding much of such books as Treasure Island or Journey to the Center of the Earth.
  • Don't waste your time reading "fast-food" type books, like the Babysitter Club books or Nancy Drew.
  • Don't require your children to sit perfectly still beside you on the couch while you read.
Many children listen much better if they are doing something with their hands. We allowed our children to play quietly with their toys or work on some cross-stitching or a drawing or similar project while we were reading aloud as long as they stayed in the room and were not distracting or interrupting.
You can develop your child's idea of the continuity of history by making a time line of the things you read. Tape a long piece of paper to the wall where he will see it every day and mark it off in centuries. When you read about the life of Bach, mark his birth and death on the time line. When you read about the invention of the printing press, mark that point on the time line. This will be your family's life-long time line.


5. Family Worship
Studies have shown that the family that prays together at church does not usually stay together unless it prays and studies the Bible together regularly as a family at home. With regular family worship, the mind is developed along spiritual and moral lines in a way which cannot be accomplished by Bible workbooks or private devotions.

[Each family will have their own ways of dealing with this particular topic. The main idea is to realize that education of our children is indeed a spiritual endeavor and those aspects are enhanced even more in the family atmosphere. If you're interested in how the Bluedorns cover this topic, they offer their suggestions and experiences in more depth on their website.]



6. Arts and Crafts
Young children learn more through their senses. They need more hands-on manipulatives before age ten. Give them plenty of time to experiment with art and crafts. In the main room of your house, or wherever it is you spend the most time, keep a low shelf stocked with good-quality colored pencils, paints, clay, paper, scissors, glue, wallpaper sample books, fabric sample books, different kinds of crayons, sewing supplies, etc. along with a small table with chairs.
Children can easily work on their projects while you read to them. Younger children can do crafts while the older ones are being helped with math or science.
Art and craft projects can be sent to relatives, made into gifts, given to residents at the nursing home, entered into contests, taken to show at the county fair, or simply displayed in the home. In our home we have framed many of the children's works, and the walls are covered with the results.


7. Field Trips
Take lots of field trips. Early on, get into the habit of visiting the library on a weekly basis. At a young age the child will become familiar with where the different kinds of books are found and how to ask the librarian for help. Later you will teach the child to use the computer catalog and the reference section of the library.
Around age 13 (which is the beginning of the logic stage) take the child to a good college library and help him become familiar with doing research using the Library of Congress system. At age 15 (the beginning of the rhetoric stage) take him to a big university library. By the time a child is 18, he should know how to do research in any library.
When the child is four or five, begin attending your local Science and Engineering Fair. Observe all of the different kinds of projects and experiments. Encourage the child to think of what kind of experiment he could enter when he's 13 (in the logic stage).
Take time to attend concerts and plays, museums and exhibits. Visit workplaces. Give him experiences from which to build his understanding of the world; experiences he will draw upon and perhaps revisit when he is older.


8. Work and Service
Help your child develop a love for work and service. From the time a child is able to walk and talk, he should be given regular chores to perform. We're not talking about just feeding the dog or making his bed. A five-year-old is quite capable of putting the dishes and laundry away. A ten-year-old can prepare simple meals from start to finish. Children of all ages can straighten a house. The mother should never pick up anything off the floor. Your goal should be that by the time a child is in his teens he will be able to take over the running of the household.
Along with work, children should be taught to serve. One way we helped our children learn to serve was by visiting nursing home residents on a regular basis.
It's easy to forget the importance of service, since this "s" word never made it onto the list of the "3R's." While academics such as Reading, Riting, and 'Rithmetic are important, the social skills and character traits children learn while serving others are actually more important for their eventual success.
Academic skills without a servant heart lead to feelings of superiority, which in turn cause other people to distrust and dislike you: the classic "nerd" syndrome. Its cure: combine academic smarts with genuine care and concern for others. As Jesus said, "He who would be greatest among you must be servant of all" (our emphasis).


9. Discipline
Children need parents to discipline them, or they will never learn self-discipline. If the child does not develop self-discipline, he will fail in many things including the academics you are preparing him for.
Ask yourself, "Am I satisfied with the obedience of my children? Do I enjoy being around my children? Do my children honor and respect me?"
If your answer is, "No," to any of these questions, perhaps you should re-evaluate your priorities.
A book we highly recommend is The Mother At Home by John S. C. Abbott (originally published in 1833). You can obtain this book from GRACE & TRUTH BOOKS, 3406 Summit Boulevard, Sand Springs, OK 74063.

[Again, here's another touchy subject that will vary from family to family. We focus in our family on the "are we enjoying the company of our children?" and "are they thriving with a bubbling curiosity about life - including a special relationship with the members of their family and toward God" aspect of the equation more than anything else. We love to enhance their overall enthusiasm for life and for learning and focus our energies in those directions.]



10. Play
Give the child plenty of time to explore and play. Don't buy "toy store" toys (they're expensive and are usually forgotten after the newness wears off). Invest in real things. Garage sales and auctions are an unending source for things like sewing machines, small tools for working in the garden, hammers, nails, and things for building, and maybe some wooden blocks and dress-up clothes. Buy tools for exploring (a good microscope, telescope, binoculars, dissecting equipment, basic chemistry equipment, etc.), not toys for adoring. Teach your children how to use them responsibly (safe, neat, and orderly - clean up when you're done), and make them readily available for when your children want to use them.
What! Is that all we recommend for children before age ten? What about math? What about school? Where are the workbooks and textbooks and such? Next time we will discuss ten things to do with children at age ten.



The Grammar Level
By Harvey and Laurey Bluedorn
Printed in PHS #31, 1999.


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Consider this basic maxim of homeschooling: "There is only so much time in the day."
Keep this idea in mind as you decide which of the many subjects your child will study throughout his school-age years. What's the best use of each day's time?

In our last article we discussed the ten things to do with children in the "pre-grammar" level, before age ten. "Formal" academics, a stack of textbooks and workbooks, are not necessarily the most important use of our time with children before age ten. But at age ten, most children are entering the grammar level. This is approximately the age when children are ready for more "formal" academics. Around age ten, the light bulb goes on. The brain becomes physically able to make more complex connections, which, among other things, makes your child more able to handle abstract concepts and helps your child with self-management and self-control. The parent will be the most intensely involved in the child's education from ages ten through twelve.

The following is a list of ten things we believe are most important for children in the grammar level (ages ten through twelve).


1. Family Worship

Regular family worship is not just an add-on. It's central. At age ten, your child is able to grow rapidly in the knowledge of the Scriptures, through his father's instruction.


2. Literature

Begin on a daily basis to require your child to read something in the area of classical fiction, poetry, or short stories. Of course, many children are already doing lots of reading on their own by this age. Old readers, such as McGuffeys, are good sources for this type of literature. Use the library. It's not necessary to buy graded reading textbooks. Continue requiring narration. We suggest that you stay away from light reading (Jeanette Oake, Hardy Boys, The Boxcar Children, American Girls, etc.). You want your children to develop an appetite for "nutritious" literary "food," not literary "fast food." Though your children are now reading on their own, continue to read aloud to them one to two hours per day. It will be one of your favorite parts of homeschooling. Continue memorizing and reciting aloud passages of literature or poetry.


3. Spelling & Grammar

By age ten, the abstract grammatical concepts of noun, verb, and direct object are clear to your child, and English grammar (or any language's grammar, for that matter) can be readily learned. Three years of English grammar study (ages ten through twelve) are sufficient. Your child will be studying Latin or Greek grammar by age thirteen, which will render the study of English grammar superfluous - he will get it all in his Latin or Greek.


4. Latin & Greek

Age ten is a good time to start Latin grammar. A ten-year-old could spend fifteen minutes per day on Latin, while a twelve-year-old might increase that to thirty minutes. Your child should regularly review the Greek alphabet and pronunciation system, practicing his pronunciation with some interlinear reading. This will prepare him for a study of Greek grammar at age thirteen. We recommend that each child make his own Latin language notebook and Greek language notebook, where he records in separate sections such things as technical terms, vocabulary, noun paradigms, verb paradigms, etc.


5. Art & Music

If you want your children to be familiar with classical art and music, check out some prints or recordings from the library, buy some to own, or take your children to the art museum or the orchestra. At this age, you will need to critically evaluate and select things for them. Provide your children with the tools, the space, and the time for art projects. You may choose to pursue a formal art curriculum, or to begin formal instruction in music.


6. History

At this age, you may require your children to read something every day of a historical nature. Biographies, autobiographies, and historical fiction are ideally suited for this purpose. You can search the library for many of these books. You will need to critically evaluate and select things for them. It's not necessary to buy graded history textbooks. Practice narration. Continue the time line. Keep maps on the walls and locate the events your children are reading about.


7. Pre-Logic

At age ten, children are still in the grammar level, so any "logic" they do is really "pre-logic." Building Thinking Skills (Critical Thinking Books and Software) is an excellent workbook to develop these pre-logic skills and prepare them for a more formal course in logic at age thirteen.


8. Math

Ten-year-olds are perfectly capable of jumping right into a sixth-grade math textbook (such as Saxon Math 65) with no previous experience with math workbooks or textbooks. Skipping grades K-5 in math will in no way hinder your child's success in math. You don't have to wear out your child's interest and your own patience trying to get him to understand what his brain just isn't wired to handle yet. Waiting until age ten, when your child is developmentally prepared to handle mathematical concepts readily, makes instruction in arithmetic very easy. What was painfully spread over five previous years may here be compressed painlessly into a month.

We are not saying that you should keep your child away from numbers before age ten. Not at all. By age four, most children have discovered money, and you won't be able to hide numbers from them after that. Children encounter numbers all of the time. If you encourage learning, they'll be asking lots of questions, and you'll have plenty of opportunities for non-formal instruction in numbers and measurements. But we would not encourage formal workbook instruction before age ten unless the child shows a genuine interest and genuine competency to handle the work.

Before age ten, the child is largely acquiring the verbal skills of language, and your time is better spent developing his vocabulary, which is the primary index of intelligence. Remember the maxim: "There is only so much time in the day." Your time may be much better spent reading aloud to your children than struggling with math concepts your child isn't ready to handle.

We require the addition and subtraction facts to be memorized by age eleven, and the multiplication and division facts to be memorized by age twelve.

Much more could be said on this subject. Suffice it to say that formal instruction in math before age ten is historically a very recent phenomena. So are all of the problems which have developed in math instruction, hence the invention of the more "informal" manipulative curricula.


9. Science

Your child can read daily something touching on science or nature. The library may have useful materials here, or you can purchase some of the nature readers reprinted by Christian Liberty Academy. Practice narration. We view creation science videos perhaps twice each month. (These can be rented from Midwest Creation Fellowship, Box 479, Gurnee, IL 60031).
 
Perhaps you could purchase a booklet of blank pages for your child and encourage him to keep a nature study notebook where he can make little drawings of bugs, plants, or animals. He could label each drawing with its Latin name. The grammar level is the "observation" level. Provide your child with the tools (as we mentioned in our last article) and the opportunities (plenty of time for exploration and experimental observation). Visit your local Science and Engineering Fair every spring and observe all the different science projects. This will help develop ideas for science projects he can present when he is thirteen.


10. Composition

Require your child to write something every day. Girls usually have no problem with this assignment and take off writing poetry and short stories. Boys often need more help and encouragement to put the first word down on paper. It seems some boys are allergic to pencils. For the very reluctant, you may begin by writing his thoughts for him as he narrates them, or he may narrate them into a tape recorder. At least it's a start. You may choose to simply continue copy work for a while.

Some ten-year-olds may be able to keep a journal. Have them write a short paragraph every day in a little booklet or notebook. Next, have them write letters to relatives or pen pals. Don't expect more than short, factual letters at this age. Require the final draft of letters to be neat and error-free. Keep composition relatively simple until they reach the logic level.

Next time we will discuss a suggested course of study for children at the logic level (ages thirteen to fifteen).



The Logic Level: Ten Things to Do From Ages 13-15
By Harvey and Laurie Bluedorn
Printed in PHS #32, 1999.


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When children reach the logic stage, homeschooling becomes interesting! Early teens are developing into thinking, questioning, reasoning creatures. They are no longer content to know what happened; they want to know why. To put this all in computer terms: children were still "booting up" in the pre-grammar stage (birth to approximately age ten), they were "keying in" the information in the grammar stage (ages ten to twelve), but now, in the logic stage (ages thirteen to fifteen), they have begun "processing" the information.

Alas, at this stage many parents become distressed because the curriculum is getting more difficult, and the children are asking more complex questions. We are no longer allowed to teach mere capitalization rules and addition facts. We must now begin to exercise our minds with our children!

Because these children are developing the ability to think abstractly, we parents are being challenged to move out of our post-secondary-school-days comfort zone. As a result, many parents retire from homeschooling and send their children off to a classroom school.

But this is not at all the time to give up. We encourage parents to persevere to the end. Remember, homeschooling is for parents. The kids are just coming along for the ride!


Homeschooling is for Parents


How many of us went through school without learning anything in general, or without remembering anything in particular? We were neither interested nor motivated. We were simply serving our twelve-year sentence. We now have another opportunity to learn these things as we teach them to our children. We have the opportunity to learn such things as:

  • the math we never understood
  • the science from a Christian instead of from a naturalistic perspective
  • the history they never taught us
  • the classical language they never offered us
  • the logic they never allowed us to use
Homeschooling saves two generations: first the parents, then the children.


Logic Stage is Time for Independent Studies

Children in the logic stage should be more independent in their studies and should need less academic one-on-one attention from their parents in certain subjects. The amount of time the parents spend teaching at this level hinges on what kind of curricula they use. Use self-teaching materials whenever possible.


Family Worship

In the logic stage, the child should be developing theologically. He doesn't just know what the Bible says (the story line); he is developing an idea of what it means - the more subtle connections and their implications. God is three persons in one essence. Christ is one person in two natures. Only in Christ can God be both just and gracious to the sinner. Family worship is more than just a nice thing to add on at your convenience. Suggested time: Family worship - 45 minutes per day, personal devotions - 15 minutes per day.


Math

Since algebra and geometry are an application of logic to arithmetic, they will be best understood by students in the logic stage, which begins for most students at about age thirteen. The study of math will be the same in the classical approach as in any approach. As you study the concept of the trivium, you will understand why you don't try to teach a ten-year-old (grammar stage student) algebra or geometry. Thirteen- and fourteen-year-olds will study algebra I and II. A fifteen-year-old will study geometry. Saxon's Algebra I and II and Geometry by Harold Jacobs are good self-teaching materials. Suggested time: 45 minutes per day.


Logic

Age thirteen is an ideal time to begin the study of logic. The perfect logic textbook for homeschoolers has not yet been written. At this time, the most user-friendly texts are Critical Thinking Books 1 & 2 (Critical Thinking Books and Software). These books include some political correctness, but you will recognize it immediately and can point it out and teach around it. It takes two to three years to complete both books. Suggested time: 20-30 minutes per day.


Science

When students were in the grammar stage, they made observations, investigated all sorts of things in the world around them, and generally learned to love science. Now that they are in the logic stage, students will study the different scientific fields (earth science, physics, chemistry, and biology) and learn to conduct experiments in each of these fields. We recommend that the student enter a science fair or science project contest each year. (See our list of national contests in Practical Homeschooling # 23.)
This type of project usually takes several months to complete. A thirteen-year-old could begin with a simple project involving some special interest which the student has (rock collecting, cooking, growing flowers). A fifteen-year-old's project would be more complex. When our son Nathaniel was thirteen years old, his first science fair project involved varying the payloads of model rockets. When he was fifteen, he made wine under hyperbaric (high air pressure) conditions. Working on a science project incorporates grammar and logic, library research (collecting data), verbal communication skills (interviewing people and talking to the science fair judge), writing (each project needs to be written up), deciding on an hypothesis, analyzing the data and coming to a conclusion. Suggested time: 2 hours per week.


History, Literature, Composition

History, literature, and composition can be studied together as a unit. Here are some suggestions as to what to include (suggested time: 60-90 minutes per day):

  1. Whether history is studied chronologically or by interest, be sure the student understands where events fit into the overall scheme of time. (See point 5 below.)
  2. Keep an organized three-ring notebook filled with notes, outlines, drawings, essays and narrations.
  3. Students in the logic stage will do lots of reading and writing. Read biographies, autobiographies, and journals which correspond to the time period being studied, and outline or write narrations of these books.
  4. Consult primary sources as much as possible. This includes literature written during the time period being studied (fiction, essays, plays, orations, etc.). When you study early American history, read Bradford's History of Plymouth. When you study the history of the American Constitution, read the Constitution and the Federalist and Anti-Federalist Papers. The student could outline or write narrations of these pieces of literature, or answer essay questions. The Critical Thinking in United States History series (Critical Thinking Books and Software) teaches students how to apply logic to history by analyzing and evaluating primary sources.
  5. Continue the family timeline you began when the student was in the grammar stage. Timelines, especially when compiled by the student, will give him an idea of what happened in relationship to other events. "Hey, dad was in college when they landed a man on the moon!" Consult maps, historical atlases, and globes.
  6. Do history projects (to display at your public library or homeschool project fair) and enter history competitions such as National History Day. History projects will require library research, etc. Eight years ago our girls studied the styles in hats of the nineteenth century. Part of the display was a poster with pen and ink drawings of all the different Victorian hats and prairie bonnets. I have that poster hanging on the wall by my desk. We have done projects on the lost Louis XVII, Illinois women in WWII, Queen Victoria, the Great Exhibition, and the Illinois Central Railroad.
Speech and Debate

Each month have the student write and present one speech and perform one oral interpretation. It would be best to have the student perform these in front of a group - your homeschool support group or church. A thirteen-year-old's speech might be something simple, such as a report on heartworm in dogs or a description of last summer's vacation. You would expect more from a fifteen-year-old. Some children in the logic stage will be ready to start debate, while some will need to wait until the rhetoric stage. Contact Home School Legal Defense Association for information on the current homeschool debate topic. Suggested time: 2 hours per week (more if participating in debate).
Latin and Greek
Children in the logic stage should continue studying Latin grammar and may add Greek grammar. Since English grammar is best learned by studying a foreign language, the study of English grammar can be discontinued if the child is studying Latin and/or Greek grammar. Don't forget to continue with the Greek and Latin language notebooks. Suggested time: 30-45 minutes per day


Reading Aloud

Don't forget to continue to read aloud to all the children for one to two hours per day from a wide variety of literature, and keep up the narration. Reading aloud may be your favorite part of homeschooling.


Memorization

Logic-level students must continue to exercise their minds with memorization. Material for memorization could include oral interpretation pieces, passages from literature assignments, excerpts from some of the primary source documents in history, or passages written in the original languages from the Bible or classics. Suggested time: 20 minutes per day.


Okay. We've covered the academics for the logic stage. But there is more to say: The classical homeschool is not just Latin and Logic. It is practically a way of life. We've made a bunch of mistakes in our homeschooling. Here's one of them:


Fathers should be more than figuratively the head of your school. Children in the logic stage need their father. Of course, children of all ages need a father's input, but the early teens are crucial. This is especially true with boys - boys need their father's hand as they enter the teen years. It's only been in the past half dozen years that we have begun to realize this in our own family. Oh, to go back and do things right! But perhaps others can learn from our mistakes. If Junior is supposed to be writing out his spelling words and Daddy wants him to help with the lawn mower, by all means let the lawn mower win. Daddy only has so much time with the kids, so make the best use of it.